


Gamzee and Jane do the cancer sign

by Shitfacedanon



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Drug Use, F/M, Oral Sex, minor breath play
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-29
Updated: 2013-07-29
Packaged: 2017-12-21 17:42:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,584
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/903045
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shitfacedanon/pseuds/Shitfacedanon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gamzee, the ever buffoonish merchant offers the heiress a diverse assortment of whimsical wares. Yet only one manages to catch her interest. And what shall the effects of this particular potion be? Why read and discover fare smut peruser...</p>
            </blockquote>





	Gamzee and Jane do the cancer sign

Jane stared at Gamzee. He was an odd fellow she thought to herself. Dressed in an archaic purple clown getup more suited to some Italian stage drama or other jovial nonsense. Even odder to her was his lazy and easy going personality. It seemed too fake, too artificial. As if it was a cover for something. Whatever the case it unnerved her for some reason she couldn’t determine.

When she first approached him, he merely smiled and waved silently to her. Then when she finally did reach him, he offered to be her guide. But Jane refused. She had her father to find, and this joker looked to queer to trust. 

Still the clown pushed his offer, suggesting she reconsider, and still Jane shot that idea down instantly.

She looked him over cautiously. Though he acted affable and friendly enough, there was just something uncanny about him. His appearance and mood seemed wildly out of place in comparison to her surroundings, and his presence near her house, especially while she was searching for her father seemed to be oddly good timing on his part. “Was he involved in some way?” She wondered briefly.

Feeling still cautious yet slightly more at ease, or at least enough to respond, Jane spoke, “Who are you? And what darn hell are you doing on my fridge?”

Still he remained silent as ever, that calm serene smile on his face betraying nothing. For the briefest of moments Jane considered leaving to continue the search for her father, only for that train of thought to be interrupted. 

“Sup motherfucker.” He stated, his voice a low guttural sounding thing. Jane jumped at his words, though quickly calmed herself once she saw he hadn’t moved. 

“Would you like to buy some motherfucking potions?” He said to her, pulling seemingly from nowhere a small vial of some translucent brown substance. Jane looked skeptically at the clown, then to the bottle and back at him again, causing him to shake it enticingly as if hoping the act might interest her.

“Yo girl, these wicked elixirs and shit are all like motherfucking magic and all that. Totally give you motherfucking powers and stuff.” The Clown said. Jane however remained uncertain, only then for a realization to come upon her.

Casting her gaze downward and stroking her chin in thought, Jane briefly wondered. This is a game she and her friends were playing, correct? And most games do have a crazy merchant to sell useless crap; perhaps this oddball is merely one of those typically eccentric merchants that always appear when needed? It would make sense for a game as big as this to have something like that, right?

She then glimpsed back at him. Then again this weirdo could just be some nutjob trying to scam her for all she knew. Hell he could even be behind her father’s disappearance. Gamzee shook the bottle once more, giving out an inquiring “hmph?” as he did. 

“Well then tell me, what does that concoction do?” She asked. 

“One sip of this here stuff will cause you to lose the use of your motherfucking legs. However you will become a excellent kisser. Which is a totally motherfucking fair trade if you were to be asking me.” He answered. Jane however scowled her face in disgust, giving him a firm no in response. 

Gamzee turned crestfallen at her rejection, only to quickly lighten up again. 

“Yo hows about a buy one get one free deal huh?” He said. 

“Absolutely not.” Jane responded firmly. Only for him to shove a few bottles of the stuff in her hands anyway and inform her that he’d just put it on her tab regardless. As he turned to grab more items, Jane dumped them all to the ground.

Turning back to her, Gamzee pulled free another potion, this time a fuchsia colored one. 

“This here Lovely looking potion is supposed to have powerful healing properties. Something any up and coming Maid of life needs. Just 420 boonbucks.” He said. But once more Jane dismissed his claims, only for the clown to keep pushing the item. 

“Trust me; you REALLY want this here potion.” He stated enthusiastically. Jane still refused, but the clown continued to push his offer. Growing frustrated, Jane eventually gave in. Buying several if only to shut him up. 

Next he pulled free another vial. This time an olive colored one. 

“This here elixir is a powerful love potion! Just a few drops in any drink and they’re be falling all head over heels for you! Literally in some cases.” He said, one of his eyebrows rising curiously. After ignoring his last comment, Jane looked at the nasty colored concoction with a mix of disgust and interest.

“A love potion would be useful for getting the attentions of Jake. That is assuming it even works.” Jane thought to herself. Jane looked at the potion warily, mulling over her options. Most of the clown’s claims seemed to be bunk at best, and thus far he offered her nothing really of interest. That is until now. Scratching the back of her neck, Jane blushingly accepted the potion. Forking over the 420 boonbucks to the clown. 

Giving the mixture only a small whiff, she quickly backed away from it in disgust. It didn’t smell quite as bad as expected, though still nothing pleasant. Tipping the small vial only slightly to the side, she let a small drop settle on her fingertip and brought it to her tongue, only to quickly spit it back out.

It was bitter tasting with a noticeable yet faint coppery aftertaste to it. 

“Oh god this is nasty!” She thought. Quickly corking the bottle back up again, Jane almost considered tossing the thing away, but refrained, thoughts of Jake and the small chance of his attentions stilling her hand. 

“It’ll take a particularly strong drink to mask this. Roxy would know a thing or two.” She thought. Gamzee continued to offer her more potions, one being a indigo potion that he claimed would make her stronger, and a cobalt one that would bestow upon her immense luck, yet both she refused only for Gamzee to ignore her demands and give her several of both anyway. 

Eventually Jane found herself up to her knees in potions. Finally growing exasperated, she snapped at the clown. 

“Hey! Do you actually sell anything that works? So far all you’ve offered is useless junk!” She yelled.

Gamzee turned his gaze upwards as if in a deep thought. Grunting softly, his eyes shifted slowly from side to side as if he was struggling to recall something. Then, returning his gaze back to Jane, he began to sift his hand through his cod piece, pulling free various items that were far too big to fit and tossing them aside before apparently finding what he was looking for. 

It was another vial, but not as the others. Whereas they had been roughly round and pear shaped, this one was a long, rectangular bottle roughly three inches in length and about an inch in width, filled with a opaque jade colored liquid. 

Gamzee shook it as he did the previous few, only this time to seemingly help mix the fluid inside then to entice her. Another curious quality was how thick it looked to be. The other potions had been rather runny and possessed the consistency of soup; this fluid however was thick and gooey, like some candy syrup. 

Pulling the cork free, Gamzee took a small whiff of the stuff and looking satisfied plugged it again. That the clown had gone to such lengths (relatively speaking) just for this one item and that it was different from the rest had manage to pique her interest. Returning his full attention back to her, Gamzee offered the vial to her. 

“Now this here motherfuckin potion actually is something all special. Just a few drops of this stuff will make you stronger, faster, and all physically fit. And you’ll be able to heal from all kinds of injuries and stuff. Plus you’ll be a master seamstress. Though it’ll make your skin glow but you can turn that off if you want.” He said.

Jane took the vial, looking curiously at it. The effects were actually rather beneficial for a change. And what side affects there were weren’t that terrible. Though still she was skeptical. 

“And how much for this… special item?” She asked dismissingly. 

“Ordinarily I’d charge 1025 boonies for this, but I’ll make you a sweet deal and lower it to 612 boonbucks.” He answered. 

Jane still wasn’t completely convinced. Though she was certainly interested. If his claims were for a change true, then it’d be quite a boon to have something like this, hell maybe she’d even actually buy a few if he had any more. 

“How about this.” Gamzee said. “A free sample. Like a few motherfuckin drops to see if it’s all working right for you.” He suggested. Jane perked up at this. If he was really going so far just for this, then maybe the potion really was the genuine article.

Jane looked over the potion once more, and pulled free the cork trapping the jade colored liquid inside. She took it to her nose and smelled it briefly. Curiously it smelled decently pleasant. Like some tart sugary candy. Taking a lone deep breath, she turned the bottle to its side and let a small dollop collect on the palm of her hand and let it slide around. As she expected it was rather viscous, like honey or molasses, and figuring why not, Jane took the small dosage, lapping it up. 

She let it settle on her tongue and found to her surprise and relief that it tasted rather nice. It was tangy and tart tasting, like some candy syrup. Relieved now that there was seemingly nothing amiss, she finally swallowed the dollop and waited.

For a while she felt nothing. Yet she still waited, considering the possibility that perhaps it merely took time to take effect. Before she could ask the clown anything, she began to feel something. At first her body began to feel slightly stuffy and hot, and then to her embarrassment she felt her nipples stiffen and her groin ache with lust. 

Jane gulped and began to fan herself. Was this all part of the process? Or some unintended side effect? She couldn’t tell, nor could she tell if it was unpleasant even. Try as she might to calm herself, her body seemed intent on embarrassing her further. Soon her crotch grew wet and slick with arousal, and her body ever more sensitive. 

Her clothes felt uncomfortably tight and hot and she needed to be rid of them. But with the clown there? No way. More than that she needed to continue to search for her father. Yet still her body betrayed her, her legs beginning to quake and her breasts and pussy aching to be touched. Soon she found herself having to rest on the fridge just to keep from failing to her knees. 

Gamzee moved to the side to offer her some room, and soon Jane found her mind grow heavy with more primal urges and desires. Her entire body was unbearably hot and horny, and still she tried to resist. Tried not to touch herself. Perhaps if she remained still she could regain control of the situation. Hoping to stifle the raging hormones within her, she weakly began to rub her temples. 

But even this small gesture sent her even further over the edge. She looked to her breasts. Even through her bra and shirt she could still see her nipples push ever so slightly against the fabric. Gently she adjusted her bra, hoping it would help reclaim her modesty, only to feel her body seize up as the fabric brushed against her nipples. Jane clamped her legs together, forcing every last ounce of willpower to stay in control, to keep from playing with herself right in front of the clown.

But as she fidgeted and squirmed, she expended what little willpower she had left. With one last brush of her thighs, she felt the fabric of her panties ride up against her groin and ever so slightly seized up once more. It was too much, she needed release, and she didn’t care about anything else. Slowly she lifted her quivering hands in front of her, and at last gave in.

Jane wasted no time, practically ripping her shirt and bra off. Her skirt went next, then her panties. Frantically she began to rub her hands through her pussy, firmly and roughly rubbing her clit and sliding her fingers through her labia. Her other hand squeezed and pulled hard on her breasts, desperate was she to cum. 

Harder and harder she continued to fondle herself, her hands constantly shifting from one activity to another. One moment she would be abusing her tits, moaning and gasping loudly as she did, the next both her hands would be fingering and rubbing her cunt, coating themselves in her juices. 

Jane moaned and screamed like an animal in heat. Her body was overwhelmed by a powerful lust and while she was no stranger to playing with herself, this sensation was more intense, more powerful then she’d ever experience. 

She continued to masturbate, aimlessly exploring every inch of her body and letting her hands perform every kink she could manage by herself. She tasted herself, grinded against her hands, screamed and moaned deeply Jake’s name. Drooling all the while as she did. Writhing and moving wildly as she tried to get off. 

But it still wasn’t enough. She could only do so much by herself, and as blissfully wonderful as it all felt, she still couldn’t quite reach the climax and release she maddenly desired. She then glimpsed at Gamzee, who had thus far remained still and unresponsive as ever. 

“You!” She yelled, causing him to turn to her. 

“Get off your lazy duff and give a lady a hand will you?!” She yelled. Gamzee got to his feet and stood in front of her. Calm and silent as ever, he slowly pulled his cod piece free, then his purple trousers, revealing a pair of purple poka-dotted boxers. 

Jane soon grew tired of his lazy motions and suddenly grasped for the clown’s member. Firmly she stroked his shaft through the fabric, causing him to let out a loud ‘HONK!’ noise. For once Gamzee had a look other than his typically serene smile. As Jane continued to jerk and tug on his dick, Gamzee struggled to keep his normal expression, his face momentarily shifting to one of surprise and slight embarrassment. 

Jane however didn’t care, all she wanted was to feel his dick fuck and pound her. To feel it slide past her lips and gag her. She didn’t care what the stupid fool did, just so long as it got her off and soon. She continued to jerk his cock, occasionally stopping to grasp it hard or grab hold of his balls. 

Finally, when she felt his member as hard as she felt it was ever going to be, she yanked down his boxers, causing his large, rock hard dick to spring upwards and bounce briefly. Grabbing hold of his cock, Jane pulled him towards her face, making sure not to loosen her grip. 

Then, once his cock was but a few inches from her face, she began to jerk him once more, this time taking the head into her mouth. Gently she sucked on him, letting her tongue slide along the head as she moaned deeply and hungrily for more. 

Gamzee struggled to remain still, though he had planned for this in a way, he hadn’t expected the potion to affect her so strongly. Weakly he moaned, Jane sucking hard and firmer on his glans as her hand smoothly slide up and down the length of his shaft. Jane’s heady moans only getting him more flustered and horny. 

Weakly he began to buck his hips, pushing more of his dick past her lips. He expected she would be slightly mad at first, yet to his relief she seemed to enjoy it, jerking him harder and taking more into her mouth. Jane then grabbed hold of the base of his dick, and began to bob her head up and down his shaft. Each time sucking more of his dick, each time letting her tongue drag along the underside of his shaft. 

Though he was usually quite capable of tolerating most anything, the sensation this human girl was putting him through was proving more then even he could handle. Each time his head passed her lips he bucked harder. When she sucked and lapped, he wanted to push further, to feel her whole mouth around him.

Like her, he was being overcome with lust. Unlike her, he wasn’t trying to resist. He enjoyed every feeling she gave him and wanted more of it. Finally reaching his limit, Gamzee grasped her head, taking her by surprise and slowly began to face fuck her. 

Slowly he bucked, savoring the feeling of her lips passing and sucking hard on every inch. Her tongue pressing and dragging hard on whatever it could touch. She didn’t seem to mind; her hands moving to frantically play with her breasts and pussy once more. Her body writhing and squirming harder as she did. She moaned louder than before, her eyes rolling to the back of her head as she bobbed harder, pure lust controlling her now.

Though Gamzee had been the one to start deep throating her, Jane was the one to take control. Bobbing her head harder and faster till Gamzee didn’t even need to thrust. Jane then grabbed hold of his thigh, and attempting to use it as leverage, pulled herself up, only to cause the pair to tumble to the ground. 

Gamzee was on his back, Jane lying on top of him. Frantically she moved to find his dick, arousal still controlling her. Curiously, Gamzee found her ass hovering right above him while Jane was hungrily blowing his dick. And as she bobbed and sucked a rather wicked idea came upon him. 

Smiling once more, he grabbed hold of her thighs and pulled the human girl’s slick pussy towards his face and lustfully began to suck and lap her. Jane’s head shot up in shock. Softly she moaned and shuddered as Gamzee worked her over. Then, primal instinct taking control, she began to grind her pussy against his face. Her thighs clenched around his head; the clown sucking and rubbing his tongue hard on her clit. 

Jane’s body was burning. Her pussy was aching and sore with lust and an intense desire to cum. Her mind was muddy with thoughts and fantasies of every kink and fetish she could conjure up. She was so close now. At last she could finally feel herself rise ever nearer to climax. Yet still she hadn’t reached it. Looking back to the clown’s massive dick she drooled before licking her lips. She wanted to enjoy what time was left, to savor every feeling and sensation. 

Slowly she lowered her head down, taking his dick into her mouth once again. Slowly she pushed herself lower and lower, sucking as hard as she could manage, never stopping till her lips reached the base. Jane then raised her head a bit, then pushed down once more, then pulled again. Again and again she repeated, each time going faster and harder. 

She loved the feeling of his thick cock pressing against the base of her throat, and how it filled her. At times when she would take all of him in, she would force herself to stay, struggling to breathe and not gag. Then as slow as she could manage she would pull her head upwards, sucking him off as hard as she could and letting his dick fall out with a light popping noise. When she did Gamzee would suck and lap harder and press and hold her thighs closer to his face. 

But as much as either enjoyed it, both were close to orgasm, Jane now grinding herself as hard as she could against Gamzee’s face while she deep throated herself. With one last flick of his tongue, Jane’s body seized up hard. All throughout her body she felt an intense pulsing pleasure wash over her, her mind went blank with the white-hot fires of ecstasy and her legs clamped hard around Gamzee’s head. 

In response, Jane mouth sucked hard around the clown’s dick, causing him too finally cum as well. He bucked hard, and then with one last weak thrust unleashed a large torrent of trollcum into Jane’s mouth, causing her cheeks to bulge. Jane’s eyes went wide, and weakly she pulled herself from the clown’s still erect dick. 

Little by little she gulped his cum down, panting heavily when she finished. It tasted okay enough, oddly not bitter and somewhat of artificial grape candy. Weakly she crawled off him and dragged herself onto the fridge, choosing to sit as she recuperated. 

Gamzee stood up, his face once more serene and betraying nothing. Reaching for his clothes, he dressed himself without a word. Once he had finished he pulled the very same vial from his cod piece and presented it to Jane once more. Without missing a beat he spoke.

“Okay, hows about I lower the price too say… 420 boonbucks? Final motherfuckerin offer.”


End file.
